When I first started AMY&PINK in 2007, after I closed down another personal blog, and turned it into a magazine, together with my friend Hannah, a couple years later, I had only one goal in mind: World domination. And it felt great. To earn money felt great, to get free stuff felt great, to hear from completely strange people that they love what we’re doing felt great.
But there was one problem: AMY&PINK was written, with a few exceptions along the way, in German. At first, that was totally fine. We had fantastic readers, brands paid us to write about their products and parties, we were invited to events in New York, London and Rome. What could you possibly want more from life? But nevertheless the last few years I felt more and more empty and depressed.
AMY&PINK went from the feeling of possible world domination to an everyday job, without slim chances of growth. On my trips with journalists and bloggers from all continents, I was constantly reminded of a much bigger and more important world out there. And no matter how hard I tried to be successful with AMY&PINK, the truth, that most people don’t care, pushed me into a burnout.
I’ve done a lot of things to get out of this miserable feeling. I closed AMY&PINK and started a new online magazine. But that didn’t work. I turned AMY&PINK back into a personal blog. But that didn’t work. I created a bilingual version of AMY&PINK. But that didn’t work. A couple of weeks ago I wanted to sell AMY&PINK. Just to get rid of those decisions – for good.
I love AMY&PINK. I really do. It’s more than a website for me. And maybe it’s more than just a chapter in life. There are so many memories attached to this colourful logo and this strange name. And I realized that the only way to get rid of those constant worries is to get over my fears of losing money, losing readers or losing some kind of image. It’s better to try and fail than to hesitate forever.
So I’ve decided to make a clean cut, delete the German AMY&PINK and start over with an English version. I exchange safety for a unique feeling of freedom, of hope and of this amazing feeling of possible world domination, which I’ve lost over those last couple of years. And I’m quite sure this feeling is more important than anything in this mostly generic and disillusioning world.
Yeah, I know. I’m not a native English speaker. And many people from all over the world are going to be aware of that. But I’m not only willing to learn, I’m happy to. Because this decision (hopefully) leads me out of a dark place, where my thoughts wanted to crush me, into a room full of new open doors. Or something like that. Call me the great master of metaphors.
I’ll be happy if you’d accompany me on this new way to see where this is all going. But I totally understand if you’d rather want to stay with a German blog or magazine, because they’re easier to read or provide more German topics. If that’s the case, then you should try sites like Mit Vergnügen, Im Gegenteil or, I don’t know, maybe the German edition of VICE.
Thanks to everyone who made the last years of AMY&PINK great, memorable and epic. And I’m pumped to see how an international version of AMY&PINK can affect creative people from all over the world – and myself. Like Hannah told me a couple of weeks ago: “Don’t be afraid!” Maybe that’s the best advice someone can give you. It’s about time for world domination. And cheesecake.
Click here to read more amazing news about life and click here to submit your own photos, tracks and articles. Or just follow us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr and Pinterest to stay updated all the time.